(This post was originally written as a video script, I have tried to adapt it but if there are any errors I apologise)
Okay, let’s settle in cause this might be a long one.
I imagine you’re like, “who the hell is this that has just popped up in my feed after 8 months without posts”. The answer is me. Aimee. Hello there.
I uploaded to my YouTube channel on the 18th of January a chatty life update. Well we’re doing that again, but in blog form. Cause it’s been 8 months and life sure has happened.
So I am just about to go into my third year at university. WOO (celebrate). Cry. Panic.
And summer now over! Cry. And it’s been so damn HAWT and then so damn rainy. Me and the weather aren’t friends anymore. It’s a saga.
In my video I was like, “I’ve been uploading videos every two days and now that I’m back in uni I’ll be doing them every week cause that’ll be manageable!”
Well what a joke that was. BUT I do have legitimate reasons, which we’ll get into.
First Imma respond to some things I said in the video!
- I was talking about getting grades from the autumn term back, and I am pleased to say they were very good! I had three units and I had two firsts and a 2:1. So that was top.
- I spoke about Jordan coming to visit, who you’ll know if you have watched any of my other videos or if you know me irl. He did come visit, which was a reason for my not making videos cause at the time I was more focussed on beginning the new term and spending time with him.
- Beginning of the new term! I had another 3 units this term and I got 2:1s overall in all of them, which I’m relatively happy with but to be honest I’m quite disappointed because I know they could have been better if other aspects of my life hadn’t gone so terribly wrong. I’ll get on to that.
- Book. Jesus, went out the window. The reason is coming.
- Also I finished Gilmore Girls, if you were wondering.
Kay so, life after the video. So Jordan came to Southampton, spent two weeks, it was ight apart from a few silly arguments over food (literally).
And then it was February. And life was going so good, and I was super happy and super busy. I was in my Drama and Performance Society’s Cabaret and that was great, great fun! And then, We got to the end of Feb. And we were days away from opening night of Titus, when Jordan and I broke up. After nearly 6 years. And that’s where everything kind of went wrong. Or at least it felt like it.
I will not go into the details of why, YouTube, or any type of social media is not the place for that. But as a disclaimer, we still talk, we’re still friends. It’s chill.
But even though where we are still isn’t perfect, it’s taken a long time to get here and it was difficult, so, so difficult. But for the best and I wouldn’t change it.
But that’s why everything else in my life halted. In the weeks after I really, really had to focus on my priorities, a lot of things fell to the side because I just didn’t have enough energy to deal with what was happening and continue life as usual.
Reading, YouTube, Writing, all things like that suffered. I was putting all of my energy into self-care, university and the people I had around me. I have to say it’s really payed off, because I haven’t felt so good about my social life, ever. Not only did helping me through bring me closer to the friends I already had, but I’ve made so many new close friends since then and I’ve also recently began to reconnect with friends from my past and it feels so good to be focussing on these people in my life.
And it’s only really in the last few months or so that I’ve really began to feel like myself again and it’s really showing in the things I’m putting my time into. I don’t feel so constantly tired and emotionally drained anymore, I started reading again, I started gaming again, I started making videos, I’m making this post! I’m in the process of hopefully getting a new job and I’m exercising. Yes, you heard that right. Me. Exercising. Voluntarily. At a gym. I’m serious. I haven’t done proper exercise since school, and even then I constantly tried to get out of it and put like zero effort in so this is huge for me.
So, overall things are looking up. I’m feeling good.
Videos are probably going to be put on hold for a while because filming in my uni house is awkward and the lighting’s rubbish But I’m thinking of making the switch here for a bit? Because blog posts don’t take nearly as much effort so maybe I’ll be able to maintain it better? Who knows!
I’m not guaranteeing more videos or posts cause every time I do that it goes down the drain. So whether this is my last post or one of the first. Thank you so much for reading and have a beautiful day!